Camille's Travel Log

Hello to everyone out there! You have been specially selected to receive this message because you are someone who I think (rightly or not) may wish to know of my whereabouts. If I am incorrect in this assumption, I will sadly unregister you from my travel log. However, if you like, you will continue to receive countless emails detailing my adventures and journeys. If sordid tales of unabashed debauchery, clear escapism, and lessons on the material world are your bag, stay tuned.

So, for those of you who don't already know, I am in Thailand, the starting point of a journey I'm making through Asia. For those of you who knew that, well, I'm alive and am not yet showing any symptoms of SARS.

After much debate, wishy-washy fears, and teetering faith in my street smarts, I boarded a plane in Portland bound for the east on the 19th of March. Nine and a half hours later I arrived in Tokyo, Japan, after a very crowded overseas flight left me sleepless and more than a little disoriented. After a brief wandering phase in which I couldn't seem to get out of the gate area, I made it to the lounge for a cool Samporo, and then off to my second flight from Tokyo to Bangkok. Again, a crowded flight left me unable to stretch out for a nap, so by the time I arrived in Bangkok, it had been 24 hours that I'd been awake and it was midnight in one of the most crowded cities on the planet. Not a good way to start my entry into Thailand, particularly because I get a little grumpy if I haven't had a good night of uninterrupted slumber. So, after retrieving my bag and getting some initial money exchanged, I discovered that I'd missed the last bus into town, and would have to take a taxi for the long and expensive journey into the city. 650 baht paid to the taxi booth later (approx. $13 or so), I hopped in a cab on my way to meet a friend who was in the city and awaiting my arrival. After a rather funny exchange with my taxi driver, brought on by a seemingly impenetrable language barrier, I was dropped close to my destination (Khao San road, for those of you who've been), and proceeded to look for the restaurant where I was meeting my friend.

Khao San Road is a very popular and inexpensive area of the city that draws lots of foreign budget travelers (rooms here go for app. $3-7 a night), but at 1 am, it is something of a cross between Bourbon Street meets Venice Beach, with a decidedly third world edge. Lots of foreigners (westerners, mostly) wandering around drunkenly, even more street vendors selling various strange meats and rice dishes and jewelry and shoes and sex and etc., very dirty looking old women with portable karoake machines singing terrible covers as I walk by, prostitutes, loud dance music (Thai and western), aggressive salesmen and women, and much, much more. All of this assaults me and my very tired, very sore, very disoriented body. And that's not even mentioning the heat. HOLY CRAP this is some sweltering heat. At one in the freakin’ morning, this is some serious stuff. Coupled with the smell of the street, it was almost too much to bear! My body was literally soaked to the bone (and I had been wearing these same dirty clothes for days on end), and the weight of my backpack on top of it all made me wonder what the hell I was doing here!

So, along this maze of chaos I go, in search of this late night restaurant where my friend was to meet me. I had a name of a place, but no clear directions as to where it was. So I wandered back and forth for a good half an hour or more, not finding the place, getting more frustrated and hot and tired and achy, attempting to avoid people's many offers for everything under the sun, stopping in a loud outdoor bar every now and again to ask someone if they know the place, and then getting broken English in response: "Wha you go? huh? Wha you from? you sit, have dwink".. No one seems able to understand or know the answer to my question. So, finally, after walking down a side street, I run into the place and meet my friend, who had nearly given up on me. After a search for a couple of beers to take back to the guest house, we finally settle in to the room and relax in the sweltering room, despite the fan. Ah, just like the Royal Palm. I never thought I could appreciate crusty walls, raggedly-sheeted twin beds, and a view of a brick wall this much. And all for the low, low price of approx. $3 each!

So, after my initial shock, the next morning begins an amazing transformation of my spirit. So much to tell that has happened in the past 2 weeks. Listing all my adventures would be too much, so here are some of the highlights:

• Bangkok: riding on the river taxis are the best, cheapest, and most interesting way to travel in the city. I took countless rides on these rickety boats and explored much of the city this way.
• Temples, temples, and more temples. Wow. Beautiful ornate carvings, mirrored collages, a rainbow of colors, stories of the Buddha portrayed through incredibly detailed paintings and images involving flying monkeys and human-like snakes, Buddhist monks in their saffron robes wandering around (they are everywhere, not just in the temples, but riding in the backs of the river taxis, reading the paper at the market, sitting next to phallic figurines for sale on the street, eating noodles, you name it).
• Tuk-tuks. Loud smelly things that one rides in, resembling a golf cart, but attached to a motorcycle like thing up front. Price is negotiated up front, not set. Fun, fast, dangerous, thrilling, and irritating all at once.
• Food food food food food. Ah, heaven for food. Rice and veggies and mango and pineapple juice and doughy dumplings and banana chocolate fritter things made on the spot from a mobile street vendor. I can't tell you how inexpensive this all is. It makes one wish to eat several times a day, which I did. Day in and day out. I figure walking around the city cancels it all out, so what the heck.
• Shopping. It's not only fun, it's competitive! Man, I thought I was a bargain shopper before. I see a shirt or something I like, and the seller says the price is "200 baht", about 4 dollars. I cringe and wince out a "200?!" "Oooh! no, 100!" She smiles, and pretends this will just break her, suggesting 175 instead. I return the exchange with a face one makes when something is just too pricey, that weird teeth-clinched smile, coupled with a clicky sound indicating shame at a sale lost, and begin to walk away slowly. This is surely followed with a "No, no, maam, for you, 150!" At this I turn around slowly, feigning consideration, when we both know I am pleased with this negotiation and will buy. So I shell out the measly $3 and walk away with a beautiful handmade shirt, both of us happy and proud of our considerable bargaining skills.
• Live sex shows. Ok, I will not go into details. If you care for details, send me a note back and I will happily provide them. But to spare some of you, I will only say, holy smoke! Wow. What great aim these gals have. And no one even lost an eye! (see the Appendix)
• Thai massage. Aaahhh. Bliss. Like yoga and massage put together, but where you don't actually have to do any of the difficult stretching positions yourself. Approx. $2 for a half hour, followed by ginger tea and pineapple. A day without a Thai massage is like a day without water. Essential, cheap, and so refreshing. Why go without?

So, a week in Bangkok, and then I took off for the island of Koh Tao in the Gulf of Thailand. Wow. Complete island paradise. I spent 9 days here and really had to force myself to leave. My time there was not wasted, however, as I decided to take a scuba course during the days, and so I’m now certified to dive anywhere in the world. I really didn't know what to expect with diving. It's incredibly odd to breathe underwater and be 60 feet under the ocean, relying completely on a little tank to keep me alive. Our instructor was this English fellow who had this very funny, very strong accent, and sounded as though he was forever stuck in a Monty Python skit. He took teaching very seriously and his explanations and gestures were all very exaggerated and purposeful. Half the time I was so mesmerized by his voice and gestures that I would miss some of what he'd tell us. (Did he just say, "Run away! Run away from the rabbit!"' Oh, no, he said to turn on my air. Right. Makes more sense.) Very bad in that the course went so fast that essential skills are sometimes demonstrated only once. You miss it and you're in trouble. My scuba partner in the course was an English woman who had a hard time with some of the training exercises (they are much more difficult than I’d expected) and on our last dive she accidentally breathed in water at 60 feet and tried to rush to the surface for air. Our instructor and assistant literally had to hold her under the water by her tank and force her to cough up the water into her breathing hose (regulator) until she started breathing air again, which seemed to last about 15 seconds or so. It was pretty scary because a person's natural impulse is to go up in that situation, but it is very dangerous to do so as you can incur a lung expansion injury (decompression illness) from a quick ascension. Note to self: don't breathe in water.

Anyway, I finally did leave the island via an overnight, 2nd class train to Bangkok last night. Very interesting way to travel. A guy from my scuba class and I rode back together. Last night we went to the dining car for a nightcap and encountered some heavily intoxicated Thai guys who must've just returned from a cock fight somewhere. One of the guys appeared to have a broken nose, and held a live rooster in his arms as he passed out, surrounded by empty cans of Singha beer. Looked like a rough night.

I will be in Bangkok only another day or so before heading up to Chang Mai, where I hope to take a Thai massage class. The Thai festival of Songkran is starting in the next day or two. It's a water festival, and apparently people roam around with turbo water guns and drench each other throughout the country. I’m looking forward to it, as the temperatures have been in the 90s most days.

I hope this email finds you all well. If there's anyone you care to forward this to that's fine with me, and I’d be happy to add anyone to my travel mails. I may have forgotten to put in someone's address in my list, so let me know if someone is missing. I apologize for the length of this one, but believe it or not, I even edited a lot out!

Happy trails,
Camille

Go to Chapter Two